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Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Last week, I laid out my plan for reaching that mystical place called ONEderland. You know? Where your weight begins with a one?!? Yeah, the holidays probably aren’t the most spectacular time to challenge yourself to lose weight, but I know if I can do it now, I can do it any time.

Here’s what I wrote last week:


This is the first time in god knows how many years that seeing the other side of two hundred pounds was a distinct possibility. With that in mind, I've decided to set a goal/challenge for myself to see me through to that legendary place called ONEderland. Understand, very rarely do I set date specific goals. I find, in most cases, they just set you up for failure. In this case, though, setting a 25 lb goal seems reasonable and - most importantly - attainable.

My goal/challenge to myself is: By March 7th, I'd like to be somewhere near (within five lbs) or in ONEderland. I've broken this challenge up into five pieces:

GOAL 1: Seventy Pounds Gone (221.6 lbs)
GOAL 2: Get Under a BMI of 35.0 (216 lbs)
GOAL 3: Eighty Pounds Gone (211.6 lbs)
GOAL 4: Ninety Pounds Gone (201.6 lbs)
GOAL 5: ONEderland (199 lbs)

Simple enough, right? Well, I'm retroactively starting my challenge from Monday of this week, running 12 weeks from December 13, 2010 - March 7, 2011 for an average of slightly more than 2 lbs a week. I know this is something I can achieve and I'm looking forward to the days when my weight doesn't start with a two.


And I’m off to a running start. Can’t tell you how thrilled I am to report my progress for Week One. All I can say is that it was awesome, and cue the happy, booty dance music:

Challenge Starting Weight: 226.4 lbs
Week One Weigh-in Weight: 222.4 lbs
Challenge Weight Lost: - 4.0 lbs

Wow, I kind of killed it this week! Granted, some of that was catching up from my fluke gain last week. But still! I’m slightly less than one pound away from GOAL 1! And just a little bit more than six pounds away from GOAL 2!

With some epic level pub night drinking on Friday night, and a bit more Saturday night (not quite epic, but close), I’m stoked. Seriously stoked.

And, yeah, did I mention I killed it?

Seriously though, sharing my meal trackers helped, and kept me from reaching into that candy jar at work more than once. I’m a little upset that I didn’t post trackers for Friday, Saturday or Sunday. Friday’s tracker was actually complete; I was just slightly in shock seeing I drank nearly a day’s worth of Points in one evening. Once I go and reconstruct Saturday and Sunday, I will post and share all three.

Week Two looks to have its share of difficulties, not the least of which being Christmas. There’s also additional cookie baking craziness, Christmas Day dinner (which I’m making – HELP!), and the extended holiday (11 days!) I have from work.

I foresee the upcoming week being far more difficult than Week One with Christmas falling smack dab in the middle. However, I’m confident in my ability to overcome obstacles and succeed. With that in mind, I’ve come up with the following:

Three Strategies/Goals for Success for Week Two:

  1. Log any holiday cookies I eat.

  2. Keep up with my water consumption every day during the holiday break.

  3. Get in at least four days of exercise this week.



In other news, I finished my Christmas Shopping. Just need to send out a few more cards and get together the menu for Christmas Day Dinner. Will share the menu soon.

Have a great one, folks!



Saturday, December 18, 2010

My typical Friday night out usually includes going out to dinner and, later, out to the pub. Any normal Friday this usually means I drink a couple of beers and hang out until one or two a.m. then head home.

Last night, was not a typical Friday.

One of my headlights went out a few days ago and I haven't had the chance to get it fixed. Not being in the mood to get pulled over, I put it out to the world (my twitter friends) that I wouldn't be making it out unless I could get a ride to and from the pub. Ride acquired.

Having already partook at a holiday party (one cosmo - 7 WW Points! Not worth it!), not having to drive, and it being a friend's birthday meant I took it as an excuse to imbibe WAAAYYY too much. Three beers and two shots was the final tally I believe (I essentially had a full day's worth of Points purely in alcoholic beverages yesterday).

Gah, I have no freaking willpower.

Today, I'm feeling the effects of the night's excess. Had all sorts of glorious plans to wake up early, get some shopping done, work out, and get started on holiday baking. At this moment (noon!!), I am a) in bed, b) trying to convince myself to work out, and c) failing miserably.

Help!!!

Friday's meal plan to come later, when I can convince myself to actually log all that alcohol.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Hope I didn't come off too emo in my last post, nor give the impression that I'm giving up singing entirely. Believe me when I say that it is not the case in the slightest.

Part of my frustration stems from the fact that it used to be, at this time of year, I was invited to sing at a number of holiday events. During college, my choral professor brought me in (along with several others from the touring choir) to beef up his church choir. It got to the point that I couldn't plan on going to/having a New Year's Eve party because I - inevitably - was booked to sing in a gig.

Now, it seems like those opportunities are going to anyone else but me. I see flyers for events with familiar names, and it's like I've become a non-entity. People don't think about me anymore when scheduling performances. They haven't stopped happening, so my brain logically thinks, "what the hell is wrong with me"?

A wonderful lady I've sang with several times in the past left a very sweet comment on my facebook asking me not to give up singing and saying she would personally let me know about Outreach events occuring where they really need singers. Thank you, L, for reaching out.

I need to remember: a lot of this has happened because I - basically - dropped out of sight over the past year. Focusing almost exclusively on getting rid of the pounds has isolated me from many of the things I used to do. And I've also branched out into a number of other activities that, often, prevent me from getting out there.

There's a lot of things I need to make decisions about for the upcoming year. Maybe I'll reach goal, maybe I won't. I do, however, need to put some serious thought into what it is I want to do with my singing and what priority it will take in my life. For now, I have no answers; I'm pretty content just being.

Moving on...

Last night, the DH and I went - along with the BFF - over to Stanley's Sports Bar to watch the San Jose Sharks vs. Dallas Stars game (yep, I'm a huge hockey fan. Only sport I watch. Go figure, live in California in a place where it never snows and have a thing for a winter sport - haha!).

Have you ever noticed just how BUILT hockey players are? Day-um. Just sayin'.

Back to the point: sports bar. Bars of any sort. They're a little difficult for me because I enjoy drinking and its social aspects. It's easy to knock back a beer (or three! And shots! And margaritas!) without thinking about it. Add to that tasty bar food, and you have a real recipe for "ohmygod-how-many-points-did-I-just-have?!?!?!?!?!"

Anyhow, I'm gonna crow because I did really well last night. Only had one mozzarella stick and one piece of fried zucchini. Go me! Then ordered a chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat, didn't eat all the bread, nibbled on a couple of fries, and gave the rest to the DH. Finally, I only drank one beer! Yep, just one! Then drank water for the rest of the game. It's happy dance time because this is a HUGE victory. Super Huge. Big, freaking, honking huge!

On that note, here's my Thursday meal tracker (including my super duper victory from yesterday!!!):

Thursday's Meal Tracker:

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Daily PointsPlus Target: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 39
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 28
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Activity:
Biggest Loser Boot Camp, Level One - 3 Activity Points Earned
Yoga, 40 minutes - 3 Activity Points Earned

Breakfast:
Egg white scramble - 3 Points
- 1/2 cup egg whites
- 1 wedge Laughing Cow Light Original Swiss
- 1 svg. Kirkland Signature Bacon Pieces
Green Monster Smoothie - 3 Points

Morning Snack:
None.

Lunch:
Lean Cuisine Santa Fe Style Black Beans & Rice - 7 Points
Ghiradelli Chocolate Square with Mint Filling - 2 Points

Afternoon Snack:
Fresh Fruit Salad - 0 Points

Dinner:
1 mozzarella stick - 2 Points
Fried Zucchini - 1 Point
1 1/2 pieces Wheat Bread - 2 Points
Bacon, 1 1/2 slices - 2 Points
BBQ Sauce, 1 tbsp - 1 Point
Chicken Breast, 6 oz - 6 Points
Several French Fries, Baked - 2 Points
Beer - 5 Points

Dessert:
None.

Daily PointsPlus Eaten: 36
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 38
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 34
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Holy cr*p! I'm nearly at 42 Weekly Activity Points Earned - the WW max for swapping! And there's still three more days of tracking this week. Not that I plan on dipping into them.

Have a good one folks!!!!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Grr! Argh!

(Please Note: the title of this post has entirely nothing to do with its contents.)

Confession time: I've been playing with the idea of renaming this blog. The singing part? Frankly, it's not happening right now. Not that I haven't tried, but even with 65+ lbs gone, no one's hiring. Thing is, I love singing. Seriously, I sing all.the.freaking.time. In my car? Yep. Decorating the Christmas Tree? Yep. Sitting at my desk at work without even realizing I'm doing it? Yep.

Now, I get nothing but good feedback from my auditions, and can usually count on a callback, but - in the end - it's the director's decision. When you have a sea of fifty women who are all equally good, it always comes down to looks and personal taste. When you're the only one or one of two larger women called back, unless you are so completely frakking spectacular (like fireworks are going off when you sing and a Souza March playing in the background), and there's a smaller person to cast - guess who it's gonna be?

Really, though, I'm okay with it. It's been giving me plenty of time to focus on what I'm doing right now. And find other ways to get my singing in public fix.

That fix has recently come by going out to karaoke bars, not too often, but every couple of weeks. There's this great one I go to Monday nights that isn't too packed, and I can crank out a good five or six songs between 8:30 p.m. and midnight. Grab a couple girlfriends, a couple of beers, and you have one great night out. But wild horses couldn't drag the DH out.

I used to get my singing in public fix at this one place in Sunnyvale that closed down a year or so back. Gah, I miss it soooo much. The restaurant - Cattleman's - had a Thursday and Friday night open mic jazz night in the bar, piano player provided. Sometimes a drummer would sit in, and from time to time a stand-up bass player. All you had to do was bring lead sheets enough for the band and get up to sing. This was freaking heaven. I loooove singing jazz. It's fun, it's totally different from classical music, and it gives your improvisation chops a serious workout.

However, when I look at what I'm doing singing-wise now, I can't help but be disappointed. There's this little part of me that worries if I suck, if people are just humoring me, or if they don't want me around. It's just a little bit paranoid, but I was doing so well there for a while.

At the same time, I can't fixate on this. There is more to me than singing and weight loss (there's beer! HAHAHAHA!). Sometimes I worry if I've pigeon-holed myself into talking ONLY about singing and weight-loss related activities, and that makes Zan a Dull Girl.

Here's your warning. There might be a name change here in the near future, so don't be scared.

And, while I'm at it, here's yesterday's food tracker:

Wednesday's Meal Tracker:

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Daily PointsPlus Target: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 39
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 18
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Activity:
Stairs, 3 Activity Points Earned
Biggest Loser Cardio Max, 7 Activity Points Earned

Breakfast:
Green Monster Smoothie - 3 Points
Yep, the Points went up. I started adding a whole cup of Light Soymilk and less water.

Morning Snack:
2 Archer Farms Organic Strawberry Fruit Strips - 2 Points

Lunch:
Eating Right Black Bean Soup - 4 Points
Archer Farms Organic Strawberry Fruit Strip - 1 Point
Baby Carrots - 0 Points
Ranch Dressing, 2 tsp - 1 Point

Afternoon Snack:
Yoplait Light Strawberry Yogurt - 3 Points

Dinner:
Round Table, Skinny Crust, Guinevere's Garden Delight Personal Pizza - 12 Points
DH's Pizza crusts - 7 Points

Dessert:
Hershey's Chocolate Miniature, 2 pieces - 2 Points

Daily PointsPlus Eaten: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 39
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 28
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

I can't tell you how happy I am that I didn't dip into my weekly points. The DH and I are going to a work-related Holiday Party tomorrow after work, then after that my usual pub night out with friends. Probably equals a good 10 or 12 point dip into the Weekly Points.

And on an entirely different note, I should think twice about doing two different Bob Harper workouts in two days. That man loves lunges so much, and I hate them, so do my calves. Ugh. So sore, but at least it's a good sore.

Have a good one folks.



Wednesday, December 15, 2010

It's been a long time since I saw the other side of two hundred pounds. Years and years and YEARS. Somehow in every previous incarnation of my weight reduction self, getting to the other side of 250 meant I started slacking, and eventually dropped completely off the wagon. I don't know what it is, whether I was scared of success or that elusive, mystical, magical land of health.

And when I went off plan? If you can think of an excuse, I used it. Here are some gems that folks will likely recognize, I'm sure:

- I'm happy at this weight.
- I wanna be able to eat whatever I want.
- Exercise is hard.
- I wasn't meant to be skinny.
- I don't feel *that* bad.

You know what? Every time I claimed I was happy being severely obese, or whined I wasn't meant to be skinny, or said I didn't feel that bad, I WAS LYING! I'd see people who had managed to do exactly what I was claiming I couldn't, and it made me so green with envy.

There's times I think about it and get angry at myself, but if there's one thing I've learned it's that we can't change the past, what's important is what we're doing now. So, instead of getting angry at myself for past mistakes, I must remember what I've accomplished and that it's something to be proud of. Now, I've said it before and I'll say it again, this is the longest I've ever made a lifestyle change and stuck with it. See, I'm proud.

Back to the point of this post (yep, I wandered off on a tangent - SURPRISE!)

This is the first time in god knows how many years that seeing the other side of two hundred pounds was a distinct possibility. With that in mind, I've decided to set a goal/challenge for myself to see me through to that legendary place called ONEderland. Understand, very rarely do I set date specific goals. I find, in most cases, they just set you up for failure. In this case, though, setting a 25 lb goal seems reasonable and - most importantly - attainable.

My goal/challenge to myself is: By March 7th, I'd like to be somewhere near (within five lbs) or in ONEderland. I've broken this challenge up into five pieces:

GOAL 1: Seventy Pounds Gone (221.6 lbs)
GOAL 2: Get Under a BMI of 35.0 (216 lbs)
GOAL 3: Eighty Pounds Gone (211.6 lbs)
GOAL 4: Ninety Pounds Gone (201.6 lbs)
GOAL 5: ONEderland (199 lbs)

Simple enough, right? Well, I'm retroactively starting my challenge from Monday of this week, running 12 weeks from December 13, 2010 - March 7, 2011 for an average of slightly more than 2 lbs a week. I know this is something I can achieve and I'm looking forward to the days when my weight doesn't start with a two.

The first stumbling block in my challenge? The Cookie Baking craziness I'm throwing myself into this weekend. Chocolate chip cookies and ginger snaps and sugar cookies and peanut butter cookies, oh my! They're mostly going to good homes, but I've no doubt a goodly number will stay put right at home.

In other news, the Christmas tree is completely decorated and most of the Holiday decorating is done. Yay! That's one thing crossed off my to-do list. In its place, I add the next to-do: Christmas Cards and Christmas Shopping. Gah.

And following up on my list of Goals for this week, here my food tracker from yesterday:

Tuesday's Meal Tracker:

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Daily PointsPlus Target: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 42
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 6
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Activity:
The Firm Cardio Overdrive, 12 Activity Points Earned

Breakfast:
1/2 Cup Better'N Eggs All Whites - 1 Point
1 Wedge Laughing Cow Light Original Swiss - 1 Point
Green Monster Smoothie - 2 Points

Morning Snack:
None.

Lunch:
Lean Cuisine Sesame Stir Fry with Chicken - 7 Points
So Delicious Soy Ice Cream Sandwich - 2 Points

Afternoon Snack:
Apple - 0 Points
Baby Carrots - 0 Points
Ranch Dressing, 2 tsp - 1 Point

Dinner:
Miso Soup - 2 Points
1 cup White Rice - 5 Points
Sashimi, 9 pieces - 3 Points
Sashimi (Salmon), 3 pieces - 2 Points
Sushi Roll, 3 pieces - 3 Points
Mixed Green Salad - 0 Points
Sesame Salad Dressing - 2 Points
1 Piece Vegetable Tempura (Squash) - 2 Points
Edamame, 1/2 cup - 1 Point

Dessert:
2 pieces Ghiradelli Peppermint Bark - 4 Points

Daily PointsPlus Eaten: 38 (3 Weekly Points Used)
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 39
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 18
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Yeah, the Peppermint Bark took me into my Weekly Points, but I planned on it. Yay! Have a good one folks!



Tuesday, December 14, 2010

In my last post, one of my goals was to track every bite I eat this week. I know I've been bad about this in recent months, grabbing a little bite here and little bite there, then forgetting about it. So, here it is:

Monday, December 13, 2010

Daily PointsPlus Target: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 49
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 0
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Activity:
Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred, Level One, 6 Activity Points Earned

Breakfast:
1/2 Cup Better'N Eggs All Whites - 1 Point
Green Monster Smoothie - 2 Points

Morning Snack:
Fiber One Chewy Bars, Oats & Chocolate - 4 Points

Lunch:
Eating Right Split Pea Soup - 4 Points
Snow Peas, 1/2 Cup - 0 Points
Baby Carrots, 1 Cup - 0 Points
Cheese, 1/2 oz - 2 Points
Ranch Dressing, 1 tsp - 1 Point

Afternoon Snack:
2 Hershey's Miniatures - 2 Points

Late Afternoon Snack:
WW Dark Chocolate Turtle Bar - 2 Points
Handed out at my WW meeting. Wouldn't have touched it otherwise.

Dinner:
Wendy's Spicy Caesar Salad - 12 Points
Wendy's Lemon Caesar Dressing, 1/2 packet - 2 Points
Wendy's Small Chili, No Cheese - 5 Points
Wendy's Fries, 4 Fries - 1 Point
Wendy's Chicken Nugget, 1 Nugget - 1 Point
Soda, 8 oz. - 3 Points
The fries, chicken nugget and soda were all from the DH's meal. Fries eaten in car on way home from picking up food for dinner. The soda was because it was there and the DH didn't finish it. The chicken nugget? Dunno why I ate it.

Daily PointsPlus Eaten: 42 (7 Weekly Points Used)
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 42
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 6
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Let's look at this: I had an extra seven Points almost without thinking. I wouldn't be upset if those foods had satisfied me in some way, but as I recall they only made me want more junk.

On the plus side, up until lunch I was completely on plan. As a matter of fact, if it weren't for the unplanned foods (WW Dark Chocolate turtle bar, fries, chicken nugget and soda), I wouldn't have gone into my Weekly Points at all. But if I was doing this all week long last week, then I'm not surprised I had a small gain this week.



Fact: About five months ago I stopped drinking my green goo (read: green monster
smoothie
).

Fact: About five months ago I stopped going to Weight Watchers.

Fact: About five months ago I stopped exercising regularly.

Conclusion: By no longer guzzling the green goo, I fell off the wagon. HAHAHAHAHA!

Okay, okay! So it's not entirely accurate (and fallacious reasoning I might add), yet - I promise - these things are actually related to one another. However, one did not specifically lead to the other.

Even though they are ridiculously yummy, in my mind I identify the morning smoothie as "Health Food". Yes, it's tasty. Yes, it's filling. But it's also entirely associated with my weight reduction program. I started drinking the smoothies when I started blogging (and going to WW), hence, Health Food.

Further, In the morning, I'm more of a grab and go kinda person. Making a morning smoothie requires me to actually put aside five minutes of my precious time (time I could be in bed, asleep) to pull together the ingredients and blend them. You might be thinking "Five minutes isn't that much time!!", and you're right, but in the mystical world of Zan five more minutes of sleep could be the difference between "grr" grumpy and "hi" happy.

So, continuing to make smoothies every morning is an exercise in willpower which, in turn, adds fuel to the fire of determination, and provides that kick in the pants I need to wake up at five or five thirty a.m. every weekday and workout.

Alright, maybe this isn't so much about green smoothies as it is about exercising some self discipline. And I can proudly say I've been employing it to great effect: waking up at five a.m., getting in a good workout, making breakfast to actually eat AT HOME, making up smoothies, and still giving myself more than enough time to look perfectly polished before heading off to work.

Yep, I'm crowing just a little bit (A LOT!!!). It is amazing what you can do when you put your mind to it.

In other news, went to Weight Watchers last night (yay, three weeks in a row!). Was up a little (boo!), but I chalk it up to a) not tracking as well as I should, b) Aunt Flo's on her way to visit, and c) added in a pretty intense toning workout several times a week.

Three Goals for Success in the Coming Week:


  1. Track everything I eat. Even if I don't want to.

  2. Lay off the candy jar at work. There's Ghiradelli Peppermint Bark at home, and that's way tastier than anything in that candy jar.

  3. Cook a couple of meals at home.

  4. (okay, four, I lied) Get the rest of the Xmas stuff up (not specifically related, but it'll make me feel A LOT better)


And oh, look, self-disciple means I'm actually blogging again. I've missed this. See y'all real soon.



Monday, December 13, 2010

Been feeling pretty down today after seeing a picture of me from the weekend. You know how it is, feeling kinda awesome and thinking you look pretty good, then BANG, there's this picture and it isn't what you thought.

Sunday afternoon, I took the opportunity (willingly!) to go hiking with some friends down at Uvas Canyon County Park. The weather was perfect, sixty some odd degrees (yes, sixty - that's why I live in California), and we were in the middle of a reprieve from the rain. What better opportunity to get out, enjoy ourselves and catch up with some friends I hadn't seen in a while?

WARNING: This is not the Zan you're looking for, she has been replaced by some alternate universe version of herself.

Like I said, I was feeling really good about myself, and the hike was a lot of fun. One friend was running around taking pictures most of the hike. Instead of hiding from the camera, I was interested to see how I looked after losing 65+ lbs.

Here's a sampling of the thoughts that ran through my head after seeing some of these pictures: a) I obviously have a lot more work to do; b) my thighs look like sausages; c) won't be wearing those jeans again for a while; d) is my belly really THAT big?; e) Dear lord in heaven, why is my forehead sooooo freaking large; and several other really ugly thoughts that I will not share here.

Guess who's their own worst critic? Oh yeah, that'd be me.

Part of me contemplated posting the offending picture here and circling everything I find wrong with it. Which isn't a good idea.

Why, why, WHY do I have to pick apart every miniscule detail? What is it about me that can't celebrate obvious progress? So, to be fair, I was never all that fab about myself in pictures even when I was younger and much smaller. So why should I be okay with them now? I'll probably never get over this whole not liking pictures of myself thing.

So, instead of obsessing over that freaking picture (which I've been doing - all morning), I've decided to focus on something positive.

Good thoughts for today:

1) I went effing hiking. And enjoyed it.
2) I'm wearing smaller sizes than I've worn in ages.
3) None of those sizes begin with a two followed by another number.
4) I feel amazing, and can do so many things that I couldn't do a year ago.

Alright, obsessing mostly over, moving on, nothing more to see here. And hope everyone has a great week!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Butt kicks. If you're a Jillian Michaels (JM) fan at all, you probably know the exercise I'm talking about. For anyone else, it's an old school calisthenics exercise wherein you're essentially running in place trying to kick yourself in the butt. Ha, ha, hence the name.

Now, imagine those butt kicks in the same circuit as high knee runs. Then add in some jumping jacks. And just for fun, another grueling exercise with some kind of plyo component or such crazy jazz, and then do it all over again. This, my friends, is ONE CIRCUIT of Jillian Michaels Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism (BFBM). There's a full on five additional circuits of this hell (it's frakking relentless). And this is the workout I - willingly - did this morning.

Yup, my butt has definitely been kicked - both metaphorically and physically.

Honestly, Jillian Michaels scares the living sh*t out of me. If I see a workout with her name on it, a little shiver of fear runs down my spine. One might think that if I'm sooooo afraid of her and her workouts, I - like any reasonably logical person - would stay as far away from them as humanly possible. WRONG. SO WRONG. OH NO, instead my crazy self has to go buy the freaking thing, let it sit on the shelf for a few months just so I can fear it a little bit more, and finally work up the courage to have my ass handed to me after being pounded into mush.

The most frightening part of this whole thing? I love it. If a workout isn't scaring the hell out of me, kicking my ass or pushing my limits, I'm bored. Like walking, for instance; it just doesn't do it for me. Walking is a mode of transportation from one place to another, that's all. It's not a workout. The few times I've walked as my daily activity, I got so ridiculously bored. If I have to go someplace a mile or two away, I'm happy to walk it. But tell me to go walk two miles for no reason? No thanks.

Lately, I've noticed that most of the workouts I did when I started out exercising last year and thought were hard are barely blips on the radar. That WW Get in Shape (or whatever the title was from ages ago) with the low, medium and high intensity workouts? Yeah, I don't touch the low or medium intensity workouts anymore. And the high intensity workout? Barely difficult enough to keep my attention for thirty minutes.

Thing is, this is such an unusual feeling. Really. When did I become that chick who has to do the super hard workout (and don't get me wrong, I know there's waaaaayyy harder workouts out there than I do) to feel like she's actually working? That isn't me. But it is. It's the new me. The new me has the desire to be in the best shape she can because it feels so damn good.

It makes me realize that my secret ambition, that thing I've always wanted, but never thought possible, really is in the realm of possiblity. This deep-seated desire to just be able to run isn't a pipe dream. All those butt kicks? high knee runs? jogging in place? If you really think about it, that's running. Or at least a prelude to it. Maybe I've been making excuses all along. Well, I'm not making excuses anymore. If I can face the terror that is JM, I can learn to run.



Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Wow, real soon turned into a month and a half. Spectacular. Welcome to the world of "OMG, I lag so freaking much".

You know, I actually start every week with the intention of writing a blog post, but by week's end have managed to completely forget and/or move on to something else. Did I mention I'm a little scattered lately? Ha!!

Truthfully, I haven't had much to say the past few months because I wasn't actively pursuing weight loss, and other related guilt issues surrounding my lack of motivation. However, in news of the thank-god-I-finally-did-it variety, I'm back at Weight Watchers meetings on a regular basis (and aren't you glad I'll stop WHINING about it now). Granted, it took the introduction of a new food plan to make me drag my butt back to a meeting, but there I went. And surprise, in the months between now and stopping, I managed to get rid of nearly eight pounds! Not too bad for a girl who mostly stopped thinking about it.

Now, the introduction of the Points Plus system took me by surprise. The smack myself upside the head for not paying much attention to the blogging world or going to meetings kind of surprise. Seriously, the first I heard of this MAJOR plan change was a few weeks back because of this notice on my iPhone. It prompted me to delve back into the blogging world in search of news about this new plan I'd never heard anything about, but apparently it was everywhere. Why am I the last one to figure these things out?

Okay, bad Zan, no cookie.

My initial reaction? Denial. BUT I LIKE POINTS!!!! I've liked the Points system since it was introduced in the 90's! I won't give up my Points! Grr! Argh! Roar! *sulk* They can keep their stupid new plan, I'll just keep doing Points. But once I got over my impression of a preteen throwing a temper tantrum, logic prevailed (Damn you logic and your whole sensibility thing!!!). I've followed other plans and been successful. Further, reason dictates WW wouldn't release a plan that didn't work. Might be that whole them being a business and making money. Or something like that.

Week One Verdict? I like it. My reluctance stemmed from a desire to keep on doing the same thing. I knew the old plan, I didn't have to think about it. The new plan, on the other hand, really makes me think about WHAT it is I'm eating, not just how much I'm eating (which, BTW, 0 PointsPlus Fruit, ZOMG!!!). And I'm eating a whole lot more. Go figure. I'm sure everyone is sick of hearing about it, but if I have to choose between a 3-4 PointsPlus 100 Calorie Pack or a 0 PointsPlus apple, guess what I'm gonna choose? If you said 100 Calorie Pack, you're WRONG!

With the completion of Week One, 1.2 lbs are gone (for a total of 65.8 lbs). Sweet. I'm quickly approaching that happy 70 lbs gone forever mark. Yeah, I'll do my happy dance alright.

I have no plans of promising another blog post in the near future, although I have another one or ten percolating in my head. So maybe, just maybe, you'll start seeing more (or less as it were) of me soon.


;;


Small goals are the key to success or so I've been told. To kick off my weight loss journey I wanted to give myself a visual tool to see how my progress is going. For your viewing pleasure, the ticker for my first goal of losing 20 pounds: